About

What I Noticed

I’m not a doctor. I'm not a guru. I'm just someone who spent years trying to fix what I thought were unrelated problems: anxiety, digestion, fatigue, restlessness.

Only later did I begin to see the deeper patterns. What first looked like coincidence started to feel like a signal. With the help of certain catalysts, uncomfortable but clarifying, I began to see how much I’d missed.

The more I studied systems thinking, the gut-brain axis, and the role of the microbiome, the clearer it became that most of what I was dealing with wasn’t isolated. It was connected. Sometimes tightly. Sometimes invisibly.

Pain and meaninglessness don’t just coexist. They reinforce each other. But not all harm originates internally. Some of it comes from contact, from other systems, other people.

That pain doesn’t need to be denied or overwritten. It can be listened to. Understood. Integrated. Healing, if it happens, doesn’t come from silencing symptoms. It comes from tracing them. From watching how they move through a life. From noticing the feedback we’re taught to ignore.

I don’t chase answers. I look for structure. Writing helps me make sense of what doesn’t resolve cleanly.